A Christmas Post

This is a retelling of a story I published on decidinglybob.wordpress.com

It will pull the child from every adult and get us in the festive mood.

Constance Claus and an elves wish.

Christmas Eve –  two am – Constance Claus decided it was time. She tiptoed through the snow filled square. Though the sound of the elves snoring was reassuring Constance was being extra careful. She knew Enda could hear a feather drop in snow.

“I wish I could snore in harmony like them.” She paused, mid step to listen. “Ahh. I know the name of this tune. Let’s get this party started.'” Bending down to rub her white cat, she murmured, “we agree, don’t we Summer?”

The cat shook her paws before continuing on to the doorway of the workshop.

Constance believed her idea was brilliant. She was tired of listening to the elves moaning about the amount of snow. They are getting themselves in such a state that they are catching cold. She shivered at the thought of catching such a dreadful thing.

With her hand on the door knob, she paused to check again. Their snores floated on ice cold air to her. Satisfied she walked inside, flicking on lights as she went.

The workshop looked empty and vast. It wasn’t that way an hour ago.

*   *   *   *   *

Panic had been the order of the day. For a start, getting Santa into the sleigh  proved to be difficult.

“Steady on, mind my trousers.” He shouted as the elves formed a line and pushed him into the sleigh.

“Let’s fit the other toys in around him when we squish him down,” Enda  suggested.

“Hey Enda, less of the squishing. I can sit down.” Santa roared.

“You do the squishing bit.” Enda’s brothers, Slim, Noel and Sam, sang. They preferred to stay out of his way during the fraught filled minutes of final preparations.

Constance walked up to Santa, “Wait dear, you forgot your thermal insulated gloves.” She narrowed her eyes, “did you remember to put the matching socks on?”

He gave a nod then grimaced because they were hotter than he liked.

She said, “Good. I packed you a snack.”

At the mention of food he cheered up.

“And some liquorice for the reindeers.”

When he scowled, she chuckled, “a thermal mug of hot chocolate and a barrel of ginger nut elf biscuits for you. Take your time. Remember the list. Drive carefully Mr. Claus.”

Santa scowled. “That incident with the plane was not my fault, the idiots came closer for a second look. The reindeers lost their bootees with fright. As for the traffic lights in the main street, it wasn’t my fault, Mrs. Claus, I didn’t know they could swivel.”

The elves scurried away to check the reindeer’s boot laces.

She kissed the tip of his nose then worked her way around the reindeers planting a kiss on top of every head or they would be jealous.

“Have a nice rest, be kind to yourself Constance do something for you just for a change.” With those words he left.

“I will indeed,” she said.  Armed with a giant cup of creamy coffee embellished with a sprinkling of coco and a flake bar,  to get her creative motor running she began to plan. She liked inventing things, and tonight she felt like doing so.

 “Deciding to invent something is easy. The problem is doing it without causing further complications along the way.” Constance bit into her flake bar.  “Oh dear I will have to be careful. I remember poor little Elsie’s hair. Poof, up it went in a rainbow cloud of smoke when I made a hair curling tongs for her. And poor Jake tested my first sock warmers. He couldn’t bear to reveal his scorched foot to anyone for a long time. It looked so hideous. I got sick when I changed the bandages, but then I suppose that was my punishment for the damage I did.”

To dispel that nasty image she nibbled on the flake bar. Summer neatly caught the bits that fell towards the floor. There was silence for a long time as Constance sat and considered if, maybe, this was another stupid idea. The clock chimed. She glanced up at it. A scroll flipped down. It read, “late Christmas eve, go to bed.”

She muttered, “You are correct. I should but I won’t get an opportunity for another twelve months. So lets start.”

*   *   *   *

Once in the work shop she began by grabbing her tool box and plugging in the compressor. Bright blue sparks flew about her. Steel screeched as she cut and shaped. She didn’t realise she was finished until she reached for the last nut and bolt and discovered there was no more.

 “Now for the fun bit, testing and trying.” She hesitated. “Bother health and safety but I can’t ignore it.”

Getting ready for the test took more time than she bargained on. She dressed with care but she frightened Summer who raced towards the woods.

“Coward,” declared Constance as she pulled on the goggles and the thick safety gloves, before checking everything. “Right let’s check first,  safety harness for climbing. Hard hat, in case I slip. Bright obnoxious yellow jacket to make me highly visible, in case I get stuck under the snow.” She lifted one booted foot and stopped, they were of course safety issue, heavy and cumbersome.

 Saying a quick prayer to her guardian angel she went to drag her monster invention out of the workshop. It wouldn’t budge.

She stood looking at it wondering how to get it moving, then spotted a pair of roller blades, “perfect.”

Minutes later it sat outside in the snow, looking like a forlorn giant dog. Humming merrily she pressed the on switch. Clipping her rope to the central Christmas Pole in the middle of the square she took a look at the trampolines. They were lined up in strategic spots. They were used for hanging up lost and fallen lights or icicles. “Tonight I have another task for you,” she said.

Taking a leap she began to bounce along the trampolines hovering all of the snow from sight!

Constance was woken by a loud rumpus. It roared in her left ear. Sitting upright in her bed she discovered wasn’t easy as elves were climbing up onto her bed. From the muffled sounds beneath her she guessed a few were hidden underneath her bed.

“It’s been stolen, Christmas has been nicked.” Enda squeaked. His brothers took up the shout. “Not one snowflake left. Christmas is lost.”

“Not at all. It’s….” Constance smiled. “Isn’t this what you wished for?”

“No course not. It’s gone.” There were elves sobbing and moaning all around her.

She chewed on her bottom lip while considering the problem. “Let’s make the most of it, pretend we are in Hawaii.”

The elves moved into a huddle. There was frantic whispering. Enda appeared beside her.  “Slim is googling it on his iphone.” He ducked back inside the large circle.

“Can we barbecue? Make flower garlands, wear grass skirts? Try limbo dancing?” Sam asked.

She grimaced and worked her way around the vision of a hundred elves who can’t cook attempting to barbecue while wearing grass skirts.

Constance nodded. “Of course we can, but we’d better make sure there is a giant bucket of water standing by just in case..”

The words, “Christmas gets burnt,” died on her lips as she quickly added, “in case you get thirsty.”

Constance watched them race from her room chattering about sun lamps and sun burn. She wondered how she was going to explain this to Mr. S. Claus. With a sigh she tumbled from her bed and went to search her cookery books for tips on barbecuing.

“I suppose if the worst comes to the worst, the reindeers will not get lost this year, they will be guided home by the flames and aroma of one hundred turkey’s burning.”

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Matt’s Christmas Adventure – 2

Breeze spotted something bouncing about close to Tulip’s house. He arrived at her door and went inside. “We- have- a -problem.” He said gasping for breath after his long run.
Tulip spun around and saw Breeze. She heard his words but noticed she was missing a cake. “You have a problem. You ate one of my Christmas cakes.” She was not looking happy.
He said, “I didn’t look.” He held out both hands to her and stuck out his tongue.
“Okay, sorry I believe you. But who took it?” When Breeze told her what he thought had happened Tulip was looking worried.
“But Matt could be anywhere by now.” She paced about her kitchen. “We need to act quickly. We don’t need a Matt on the moon for Christmas.”
“Cool.” Breeze said.
Tulip glared at him. “Who made the bubble?”
Breeze whispered, “Lovisma.”
Tulip walked out onto her porch and shouted for Lovisma. By the time Tulip returned to her kitchen Lovisma was sitting at her kitchen table eating a cake. Breeze quickly explained what had happened to Matt.
“I told him it was a silly idea but the boy insisted said he would tell everyone it was me who made the food at the last party go pop and bang everytime someone tried to eat.” She was smiling at Breeze whose tongue had been burnt by the sizzling food.
“I want you to bring him back now.” Tulip stamped her foot and the whole house shook.
Lovisma said, “No need to get angry or nasty. I will have him back in a jiffy.”
Breeze surprised them both when he said, “No, I think you shouldn’t bring him back so quickly. But this is what I would like you to do.” When he told them his plan both Tulip and Lovisma were shocked but they agreed it would teach Matt to behave in future.

Matt was wide awake. The sound of twinkling bells and whispers from the stars woke him. “Santa is near.” They whispered.
Matt twisted and turned about in the bubble but he couldn’t see one single reindeer.
The bubble was sinking slowly towards the ground. It landed in the clearing near Tulip’s house. Matt could see a large group. The children were jumping up and down and racing about. The adults were enjoying Tulip’s Christmas cakes and talking to …Santa.
“I’m over here,” he shouted as he watched Lily being lifted up into the sleigh to sit beside Santa. Matt was frantic he wanted to pet the reindeer. He wondered why no one could hear him or see him. It began to snow as he watched. He sat and cried. “I messed up, stupid me. I shouldn’t have gone looking for him. I should have known he would come to us. He always does.” As soon as Matt spoke the bubble burst . The snow felt cool on his skin. He ran towards the sleigh. Breeze blocked his path. Matt looked up at Breeze and said, “I’m sorry.”
Breeze said, “Don’t say it to me, you need to apologize to Tulip, Lily, your mum, Lovisma and Santa.”
Matt said, “Yes. I will. Can I…please see him and pet Rudolph.”
Breeze was a kind ogre and he couldn’t be angry with anyone. He hoisted Matt onto his shoulder and said, “Make way for the adventurer who got a little lost on his way here.”
So it was that Matt got to talk to Santa and more importantly got to spend time with the Reindeer. As he was saying goodbye to Santa Matt was startled when Santa placed a parcel in his hand. “Specially for you Matt. Remember to be good.”
When the reindeer were mere dots in the sky Matt tore the paper off his present and discovered he was holding a ball of glass. “It’s a bubble,” he mumbled.
“Shake it,” his mum said.
When Matt shook it he saw a tiny bubble rise from the ground, snow was dancing within the glass and against a dark sky a tiny sleigh raced across the sky. He smiled and said, “Cool I won’t forget. He always comes to visit.”

Matt’s Christmas Adventure. – A Christmas 2 part story.

It was the 24th December. Every child, big and small, was hoping Santa would stop in Mudpile Wood. Last year he had enjoyed a mug of hot milk and some of Tulips Cinnamon fairy cakes. This year she planned on giving him Mincemeat bread along with his customary hot drink.
Breeze was collecting holly, with berries, for his relations. Ogres loved to decorate their cave with holly. This meant Breeze had to fight off the birds who wanted to eat the berries not sit and look at them.
He began to walk home underneath his large pile of holly which made him look like a moving holly bush. Breeze heard Lily say, “But what will we do if he doesn’t have time to stop? He is a busy man.” Breeze dropped his load of holly and sat down behind it. He wanted to hear the answer to Lily’s question.
Matt said, “I have been thinking of this and this is what we will do.”
Breeze held his breath to hear more but Matt was whispering and he couldn’t find out what Matt planned to do. He collected the holly and decided it might be best to keep an eye on the group of children. He didn’t want them getting into trouble before Christmas.

Breeze spent the afternoon decorating his cave. He finished it at dinner time. Matt’s mum Nell came rushing into Breeze’s cave. “He is gone. Matt is gone. Lily says it was an accident but she won’t tell me anything please help Mr. Breeze.”
Breeze sighed, looked very sadly at his red berry and mushroom pie, “Don’t go anywhere.” He said, then decided to scoop it into his hands to eat as he followed Nell out into the cool evening air.

They found Lily sitting outside her house. She was crying as she said, “It wasn’t my fault, or Matt’s or Lov..It just went wrong. The bubble ate him and carried him away.”
“Where to, Lily?” Breeze asked.
She pointed towards the clouds.
They all stood looking at the twinkling stars and wondered what to do next. “He hasn’t even got his hat and coat,” Nell sobbed.

*****************************

Matt was happy inside his soap bubble which Lovisma’s spell had made strong as steel. Earlier when Matt asked her to create a spell to make the bubble bigger and stronger, Lovisma was curious to see what would happen. Matt sat on a cushion of moss inside the bubble which sat on a branch of a tree. Lovisma watched him until she got bored and left.

As the sun began to sink in the sky the wind decided to play with the ogre sitting in the bubble. It pushed and pulled until the bubble was carried away high into the sky. Matt thought this was fun, he could see everyone below him.
His mum was hanging out her washing. He waved at her but she couldn’t see him. The bubble swooped low and one of his dad’s vests was sucked into the bubble to land beside Matt. He put it on.
The bubble swooped low over Tulips house. The windows were open because Tulip was baking. The bubble flew in one window and out another neatly snagging a freshly baked bun as it went.
Matt felt happy. He was warm and he had a bun to eat. Matt waited to see what would happen next. The wind tired of lingering close to the ground climbed towards the stars. The air was colder up here. Matt pulled his dad’s vest about him and waited to see what would happen next. He grew tired and curling up in a ball he fell asleep.

Christmas Mystery at Mudpile Wood.

The week before Christmas Mudpile wood was a busy place. Presents were being wrapped and cakes were baked.

Fairy Tulip met Hamish. He was wearing a white apron and a chef’s hat. He didn’t look happy.

“Where did Breeze go?” grumbled Hamish. “He promised to help me cook my pudding. I think he must be lost.”
Tulip said, “Hamish you are silly, we can’t lose a seven foot Ogre. It just can’t be done.”

“Well he has vanished.” Lovisma shouted wobbling by on her broomstick.
Lovisma was practicing a new trick. Riding her broomstick while standing on her head and spinning. So far, it wasn’t going well. She demolished the Gingerbread house, put a hole in the giant Christmas cake, Mrs. Groundsel had made. The cake looked like a very large doughnut with sprinkles on top.

“I hope he’s shopping.” Matt said. “Maybe he will buy me a pet crocodile.”

“No, he doesn’t like shopping, he gave me the list. I did his shopping months ago.” Tulip said.

They decided to search for him. Mrs Groundsel and Matt went to search the caves, the witches to search the mountain tops. Tulip and Hamish searched the wood then decided they would go and sit in his favourite tree. He was bound to show up soon. It was getting close to lunch time.

“Something awful must have happened because he missed second breakfast.” Hamish whispered.
“Hmm…” Tulip said looking into the sky. “Never mind Breeze. Snow is about to fall. Lets tell the others to get the sleds ready.”
Hamish said, “we broke them last year when we had that crazy race off the frozen waterfall. ” He sighed. “But it was good fun. We forgot about the sleds till now.”

Everyone came out of their houses to watch the snowflakes dance and twirl their way to the ground.
“But we have no sleds, ” Lisbeth said. Nobody was smiling, they loved sledding.

Matt raced back inside and returned with an old wooden tray. “This will have to do, come on everyone.”
They trudged to the top of the hill field and took turns at flying down the hill on the tray. “It’s not great but it’s better than nothing,” Matt said.

Suddenly they heard a rumble. It was growing louder.
“Thunder?” Mrs Groundsel wondered. She didn’t like thunder or lightning.
“No, but perhaps we should take shelter hurry.” Tulip ushered everyone into the wood.The ground was shaking making everybody hop or bounce about.

Then above the rumbling noise they could hear a familiar sound of Breeze laughing. With a swoosh of snow he raced past them on a giant sled.
They chased after him, “wait for us.”
He applied the brake and the giant sled shuddered to a stop.

” Where did you get it?” Tulip asked him.
“Borrowed the idea from the elves.” He told them. “It took a bit of work but all of the elves helped make it. Come on, get on. This is great. Hold on tight and let’s go.”
They rushed to sit on the sled. Breeze took off so fast Tulips hair escaped from its ponytail.
“Oooh watch out for the waterfall,” they cried as they zipped along scattering snow as they went.
Breeze smiled and kept going. The women closed their eyes, the children held their breath because they could see the end of the frozen waterfall. Suddenly they were flying high above the valley.

“We will die this time, ” Hamish grumbled thinking of his uncooked Christmas pudding.
There was a soft jolt and looking high above them they saw the reason. Laughter rang out as the giant fluffy parachute opened and brought them slowly to the ground.

Breeze looked at them and said, “I’m hungry I need a snack. Next ride will be after lunch.”
He was whistling as he made his way to Hamish’s house, because Hamish always made the best lunches in the wood.